…and then Semester 2 began…

Yea. Semester 1 was not fun. Exams have been horrible and stressful.

It’s about time I got to change modules. I’ve had it up to way over my head with quantum mechanics at the minute.

On the plus side I did get Lacuna Coil’s new album through the post! =)




It’s just brilliant!!!!

Also, I had a bit of a brainwave the other day. If Physics doesn’t take me anywhere or I fail it miserably at it, I can always become a full time blogger. Genius!right? -___-" What do you guys think?

At the minute I just need to sort out how I’m going to make money off this, but hell: you readers are my only care at the mo. No point trying to earn money off something that no one reads, right?

Anyway, last thing… I just wanted to share a track off Dark Adrenaline that hit me lyrically as well as musically.

“Intoxiated” – Lacuna Coil

Lie.

Broken mirror,
Seven years of stolen luck.
I try to fix you one more time
But I must let it die,
The dream that we’d survive.
Cut my throat if I tell a lie.

Set it free,
Lost ambition.
I overthought my place in your life.
Set it free,
Superstition.
I gave up on this fairy tale lie.

Blind man’s wisdom.
Cross my heart but it’s a lie.
I kept us going the last time.
You used one of your nine lives
I gave up all of mine.
Cut my throat if I tell a lie.

In the world that I created,
I’m intoxicated.

Set it free,
Lost ambition
And now I won’t look back,
I’ve turned my back.
I’m off the ground.
Set it free,
Superstition.
And now the air I breathe is poison free.
I’m freedom bound.

And with this, I’ll leave you until my next entry.

Is there anything you guys want me to write about? I also have a channel on Youtube where I could upload extra stuff and even mention you while answering questions. http://youtube.com/youvebeenhelpdesked
That’s all for now!
PW )O(

Utopia or no Utopia?

I recently spotted this question on social networking site Diaspora*. At first glance I thought “This guy is stupid.” but actually it allowed me to think of why I don’t really agree with the options given. Here’s the original post:

“On a personal level, would you rather live in a world where everybody was nice to each other, or a world in which everybody conformed to your ideals? (and if your only ideal is that everybody be nice to each other, blessed be, this question is not for you)”

As you can see the obvious comment would be “Go away. This is a false dichotomy. Lol…you’re an idiot.”
It really does sound like a question with two identical answers.

Even after trying to see the subtleties between the two, which I make out to be either everyone nice to each other and living in a Socialist-Utopia (ie. everyone masking their true feelings) or  everyone being nice to me and living in a Utopia created around me (everyone masking their true feelings, bar me - admit it, egocentric ideals in everyone wish that you didn't have to change but everyone else had to change and be nice to you), I can't understand why any reasonable person would want EITHER option.

Society wouldn't advance either way.

Society advances with shared ideals, individuality, small conflicts and the truces that are called afterwards. This is why the world isn't black and white.

From two or more people having different opinions on the same subject, others follow the various opinions based on their own ideas. A common set of ideas is formed in each group (and obviously not everyone approves all ideas) which then tries to win backing from other groups. Where ideas meet secondary groups are formed, where ideas diverge there is division from groups and the cycle is started again.

It's not politics. It's the human way of thinking and forming groups within society. You wouldn't have friends if you didn't share ideals and opinions, but you have disagreements with them when your values differ from theirs.

What are your ideas?
Feel free in the comments to share them or maybe even share what your reply to the post would be.

Blessings to all!
PW )O(

Disa-blinking-ppointed

You know him, he’s a good friend.

You’ve know him 4 years now.

You really became friends when he had a bad break up and you stopped him from cutting himself or jumping in front of a bus.

Your friendship grew and soon you had similar interests, went to the same gym, went around with the same group of people every Saturday night – pretty much like twin brothers.

You hear that he’s not really a good guy, that he’s been known to be violent, known to talk shit, but you don’t care…he’s like a brother to you.

And then you hear (from your cousin of all people) that he’s talking shit about you (to her), like you’re “on a leash” and won’t go out because of your girlfriend. You should have seen it coming, you already knew (almost), but it hits you all the same.

Time for a rethink…

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Hell, you don’t know shit about me.

I’m not upset, I’m disappointed.

Disappointed that I wasted time on you, thinking that you were worth something.

Disappointed that it took me 4 years to realise just how fake you are. I thought we were good friends.

Still…

Better late than never.

PW )O(

Turn around?

A bit of a cryptic title, I know.

I was just wondering how to classify a change for the better in my life as opposed to something just going right.

My computer died the other week. I played with it too much and messed up the boot labels. I was so fed up, you may remember the previous post. (No? You can always look back at it if you want.)

Just recently I've started chatting to someone who works within my Uni, when I have a minute and she's up for a quick chat, and she puts me in a right cheerful mood! (Thanks Sanja!)

Just the other day I had a right awful day - car had to be jump started, forgot my phone in plain sight in my car, couldn't get any studying done - so I just stopped, decided I needed some time to chill and meditate and only then would I go home. Went up to see her and ask if there was a room where I could do just that.
Honestly, I do find that it's the small things that make me feel better. She asked what was up and gave me a few bits of advice after I finished talking to my spirit guide.

Something seems to be going right again at least. Work is still a right bugger, but at east other things seem to be going right in some way, shape or form.

Now I just wish I had a e few hundred thousand more hair follicles successfully producing hair on my head.

I guess some things you just can't solve like that.

PW )O(

The end of a bad day, the end of a bad week?

Well! Where do I start?
Things haven't been going well, and today has just topped it all off.

My netbook has died. Looks like the BIOS needs flashing. I don't have time for it. I need my data off that computer ASAP. Yet, I have no time and no resources. F***.

Got a book out of the library thinking it would help me study. It's a terrible read and it's not helping me at all. Also, 50p to reserve the damn thing and I already had a copy of the key parts. WASTE of time.

Was so fed up just before lunch that I punched the wall going upstairs. My hand hurts quite badly now.

PW )O(

Why “The Relapse”?

Hi,

I’m a blogger and have been for a while. I started when Spaces first came out on Hotmail.

I was depressed at the time, with no one to talk to and I felt better when I wrote about whatever came into my head. I gradually let that blog die when I moved to Italy. I found people willing to chat who were friendly and available, not to say that people I knew in England weren’t, but I felt better with the new people I met. I started a new blog in Italian, it was no longer “tales of the manic depressive” but “tales with no logical flow” – same basic idea, different flavour, less depression. Then Windows Live Spaces was killed. I moved my Italian blog to Blogger and left my English blog to die a graceful cybernetic death.

That brings me to here and now.

Back in England, university student, second year of 4 doing Physics with Astronomy. I love the taste of black coffee and the smell of freshly brewed tea (with no milk, sugar or lemon juice). I’m a scientist and an artist. I’m a Wiccan/Pagan/Neo-pagan/Shamanic Witch (brought up to be a Catholic in a Catholic family verging on brainwashed, who would not approve of my choice) who’s been half-heartedly studying witchcraft and shamanism for 4 years and has only just started performing rituals (everybody works to they’re own timescale). I, like the rest of my family, have slight OCD (i.e. I’m a perfectionist and won’t stop doing something until I’m satisfied, and even then I might go back to it later).

And yes, I’m depressed again, hence “The Relapse”.

Just to set the scene, here’s System of a Down – Lonely Day. Personally I’d change the last line of the song to: “It’s a day I’ve not yet survived”.

Leave comments, just to say you’ve been here and what you think of my posts.

PW  )O(